This is really part 1 of a 2 piece for ya! (Please Note that this is a generalization, so I might be speaking to/about you in parts of this, but if something is off, like a time table, then don’t use it to discredit the entire post…have a open mind/heart…thanks)

Really you’re either a good guy or not. No matter how much you hold back, or try to ignore it, you just can’t deny who you really are. To almost every guy that goes “Oh I’m a good guy” do you really know what that means?

It means that you erase all the crap from the past (or erase as much as she’ll let go, then you start to pry the rest) You’re putting in husband work, and for what?

  • If you’re in a relationship, you will be put down 3 times quicker than you normally would.
  • Also a increase of sensitivity, and more arguments!
  • If you’re a friend, you will build her up to where she should be, minus the negative energy and people surrounding her.

Now before you all go running off with your capes on, being the good guy has a lot of downsides and dangers. You’ll go through a lot of crap….I know, before you say “We will go through crap regardless of the path we choose” the answer is NO! You will be on a very thin rope, but you’ll get to know a beautiful person. You’re basically making a butterfly. (If you have no idea of the entire process, feel free to google or wikipedia now.)

The real problem, is that usually when that butterfly flies away, they don’t look back. That’s where I’m at, and I’ve become jaded by it, but I can’t let someone suffer if I can, it is God’s work to help those who are hurt, but it sucks because they turn their backs on you after they can stand, which will lead to some ugly things on your part. But you’ll  just have to suck up the fact that this person once looked to you for  mental and emotional support acts like they are too busy for you.

It brings me to a scene from Batman: The Dark Knight; the interrogation scene with Batman and the joker, when the joker tells batman that he’s not one of “them” (meaning society) and he’s more like him. This is true in this way, because you’re doing almost the same thing their ex(‘s) did, (get close, build her up emotionally….) but instead of abusing what you were given, you actually kept things moving, and just like the joker said about being cast out when they don’t need you, that happens. Though, its not 100% of the time (ALL women aren’t that selfish….hopefully) but this is what might happen after you put on that cape, and start fighting those demons.

I, by no means, am trying to discourage being a good guy, all I’m saying is, reflect on this, and the next time you help her through her troubled times, and wipe the tears away, if she pushes you to the side, don’t undo the good you just did. I know its upsetting, but you did use YOUR time, and I don’t know about you, but anything I put my time and energy into, I want to be able to look at and say I did a good job, and it just so happens that good job is smiling better than ever, then so be it.

Live, Love and be happy

B